ANTM Meets AA

I try not to comment on celebrity fashion, as there are sites that do it far better than I. However, I saw this billboard today for the new cycle of America's Next Top Model, and I had to share it.



I have just one question: when did American Apparel start sponsoring America's Next Top Model?

America's Next Top Model - Wednesdays at 8pm on the CW

Yoke's On You

Back when I was six, I went through a "cowgirl" phase. I wore cowboy boots all the time, and whenever I was home I had on a big red cowboy hat and a set of holsters with toy guns. Fortunately, this only lasted for about six months. Unfortunately, there are pictures.



I'm pretty sure that I'm wearing this skirt in at least one of those pictures.

Forever 21 Studded Denim Yoke Skirt - $28

Why Did Someone Make These?

These shoes have to go after the jump. They're that bad. In fact, if you want to maintain your innocence, I would recommend you don't click through. It's too late for me, because you can't unsee these. It's the footwear-equivalent of the Ring tape.

So, proceed with caution.

The Curtain Rose

So, I actually really like the rose in the center of the bust. Yes, it looks a lot like 4th of July bunting. But still, it actually kind of works for me.



Am I the only one, however, who totally thinks the ruffles down the front look like curtains? I wouldn't be shocked if, inside the dress, there's a rigging system that allows you to open and close the skirt as needed.

J.Crew Strapless Chambray Wild Rose Dress - $98

The Super Squad

A few years ago, I created a team of super heroes named "The Super Squad." They had very specific, very useless powers. One of these characters was named "Stomach Face." This is a quick drawing I did in MS Paint, to give you a general idea of what he looked like.



Essentially: his face is on his stomach.



It seems American Apparel had a similar idea. Except, instead of a super hero, their version of Stomach Face just is the face of a (possibly) dead performance artist/comedian.

Just out of curiosity: on what occasion would one wear such a shirt?

American Apparel Unisex Mad Andy Poly-Cotton Short Sleeve Crew Neck - $18

It's a Hoot

If Hooters ever decides to open a high-end restaurant, I think I've found their uniforms.

Forever 21 Lace Bow Front Top - $34

A Threat to Bad Taste

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Sincerely,

The Google AdSense Team

I woke up this morning to an email from Google telling me my AdSense account has been suspended. AdSense was the way I had planned on getting revenue from the site (and, over the last five months, it's earned me about $40 from your ad clicks - I'll never see the check now, but I really appreciate that you guys clicked the ads).

I appealed the decision, but this was the response they sent me. So, that sucks. Anyone know any other advertising services I can use?

Here's the thing I want to stress: this blog is meant in good humor. I wouldn't post about any of these sites if I didn't surf them regularly because I like their clothes. I've posted repeatedly about stuff I like. As several of my friends can attest to, I was downright giddy when I saw ModCloth had commented for the first time, because I have nothing but respect for the people who work there - even if I do post about them a lot.

And I do. I post about them regularly, because I'm on their site all the time. If I weren't unemployed and sharing a tiny closet with a guy who owns more clothes than I do, I'd be buying frilly dresses from them.

I know I'm not the only one, either. And I know that at least a couple of you have started going to ModCloth because I've posted about it here. I'm guessing that, when I post about a terrible shirt at Forever 21, at least a handful of you head over there and end up surfing through the site, because no press is bad press.

I'm not saying the clothes spontaneously combust; I'm not saying the retailers overcharge. I'm just saying that sometimes, they sell ugly clothes. I doubt that anyone here has not bought something I've posted, purely because I posted it. And if you have - well, I'm shocked that I have that much power over someone, because no one should ever listen to me about anything.

I'm just frustrated, because the last thing I want is to be considered malicious. By taking away my AdSense account, that's what Google's decided I am, and that kind of sucks. They also banned my account on my other blog, C-List Actors Save Us All. So, like I said before: anyone know a good advertising service?

I don't write the thing for ad revenue, I write it because people actually read it. It just sucks because it feels like the blog was picking up steam, and now it's just been kicked in the shins.

Thanks for reading. Seriously.

- Amanda